Here are some redneck jokes to lighten up the weekend for all the lefties out there all depressed.
If your dad's cell number has nothing to do with a phone...
You might be a redneck.
If you find that you are the only one at your 10 yr high school reunion with grandchildren......
You might be a redneck.
If your above ground pool is used as a storage facility......
You might be a redneck.
I was driving to my daughter's basketball game this morning down winding country roads. The temperature was cool and the sky was so blue. I had the windows rolled down and Willie Nelson playing on the radio. I thought "All this and Bush won too" and I felt so good!
There are about one hundred things I wish I could change about this society and culture, especially regarding our children. Sometimes I get mad about it, sometimes I get depressed. But most of the time I am just so dang glad I live in a country where my voice can be heard, where my vote matters, where I can fight for change, even if that change doesn't always happen.
Thats the thing. WE ARE FREE!
We take it for granted, we abuse the gift, we confuse disagreement with hate, we confuse hate with disagreement. but we are free......
My God, I love that we are free.
Saturday, November 06, 2004
Here are some redneck jokes to lighten up the weekend for all the lefties out there all depressed.
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 10:05 AM
Thursday, November 04, 2004
1) "Shield your eyes.....do not look directly at James Carville, it's like opening the Ark of the Covenant."
2) It's the truth...bright, shining, beautiful....shield your eyes look away lest we be turned into conservatives."
3)...."But their awkward salutes did not impress the Being of Pure Light and Energy and it incinerated them."
4) "The three anchors had plenty of time to move out of the way of charging Humvee. but their brains were paralyzed with hair spray."
Stolen from The Writ of Common Wisdom. I just couldn't decide which line was funnier.
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 10:44 PM
I want Peggy Noonan to be my best friend. If you know her tell her to call me and I will buy her lunch....every Thursday....forever.
Her piece in the WSJ Opinion Journal is just....well....perfect.
Here's some excerpts, but you better go read it. It truly rocks.
"George W. Bush, 43rd president of the United States, became the first incumbent president to increase his majority in both the Senate and the House and to increase his own vote (by over 3.5 million) since Franklin D. Roosevelt, political genius of the 20th century, in 1936. This is huge."
Huge! Beautiful! It was the NY Times headline today.....right? right?
"The president received more than 59 million votes, breaking Ronald Reagan's old record of 54.5 million. Mr. Bush increased his personal percentages in almost every state in the union. He carried the Catholic vote and won 42% of the Hispanic vote and 24% of the Jewish vote (up from 19% in 2000.) "
Now that's the kind of diversity I'm talking about!
"George Soros cannot buy a presidential election. Savor. "Volunteers" who are bought and paid for cannot beat volunteers who come from the neighborhood, church, workplace and reading group. Savor."
Hey! I thought we were the party of the rich!!!!
"To admit defeat with attempted grace is a moving sight. Kerry did well."
See? She even has nice things to say about Kerry. Thats why I like her. She is nice.
"Every time the big networks and big broadsheet national newspapers tried to pull off a bit of pro-liberal mischief--CBS and the fabricated Bush National Guard documents, the New York Times and bombgate, CBS's "60 Minutes" attempting to coordinate the breaking of bombgate on the Sunday before the election--the yeomen of the blogosphere and AM radio and the Internet took them down. It was to me a great historical development in the history of politics in America."
OH YEAH!!! She is talking about us! (ok, maybe more like Powerline, Glenn Reynolds, Hugh Hewitt, and LGF, but still...)
"God bless the pajama-clad yeomen of America. Some day, when America is hit again, and lines go down, and media are hard to get, these bloggers and site runners and independent Internetters of all sorts will find a way to file, and get their word out, and it will be part of the saving of our country."
My God, you have to feel good about that my fellow bloggers.
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 6:41 PM
I have been surfing through some of the left's blogs (as you can see below) and one thing is really bugging me so I am going to get it out. Just because someone voted for the gay marriage ban does make them hateful evil people who think all gays are going to hell. Some voting that way may be hateful. But I believe that most are not. We did not have that on the ballot here, but this is the thing. One can have gay friends and gay relatives and love them and want the best for them and still be against gay marriage.
There are basically 2 reasons they are against it. Some simply do not believe that we as a society should re-define marriage in any way. We have a hard enough time keeping marriage going and strong as it is. It is easy to make fun of those who say "what's to keep a man from marrying 4 wives ect...," but it is true. Once you open the door to a different meaning for marriage then all sorts will want to plow through that door. There is no doubt about that.
Believing this does make one evil. It does not mean they are 'homophopic' or hateful. In fact I know a few gays who feel that way.
The second reason for being against gay marriage is that some believe that it goes against the teachings of Christ and His church. The book of Romans is very clear on this and arguing that there is some sort of mistranslation is just silly. You can either believe the New Testament is our Lord's guide to living or you can not believe it. It is totally up to you. You can even believe it and refuse to live by certain parts of it. That is freedom. But do not turn around and say that just because someone votes with faith and it goes against what you want for this country, that that somehow makes them this horrible person who hates gays.
Most Christians I know, like me, do not hate anyone. Like me they would not want to harm or condemn anyone. Most believe that ANY sexual sin is wrong, homosexual, adultery, or pre martial sex. So if you believe that Christians hate gays for their sexual sin, then we would have to be hating a heck of a lot more heterosexuals.
The whole 'who is going to heaven or hell' is simply not our job. That is God's job. We simply try to find the right road for ourselves and help anyone along who would like to take that spiritual journey with us.
This is the important thing. Christians have just as much of a right to vote in a way that reflects their values as non Christians do.
And finally to all the bloggers out there who think that we Christians somehow want a theocracy, you could not be more wrong.
There is a world of difference between a government that forces some sort of religion on people (like many Islam countries) and one who allows all people of all faiths (or no faith) to run for office, be appointed, or be a judge. People of faith have a right to be at the table of government. We have a right to vote our values. And it is never a reflection of hate. It is a reflection of what we believe to be right or wrong. Just like you.
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 2:23 PM
I have mentioned U.K.'s special forces the Black Watch here several times. They replaced some of our special forces south of Baghdad in order for our guys to go into Fallujah. I heard today that they were attacked and 3 killed. Our prayers are with the families. Thank you guys for having our back.
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 1:43 PM
Fox News is reporting that Liz Edwards has breast cancer. I wish her all the best. Thank God breast cancer is now curable and not the death sentence it use to be. I don't mean this sarcastically when I say that now the campaign is over it is good that John Edwards will be able to be there completely for her during this tough time. I have had friends go through this and it is vital that the husband be involved totally in the healing process.
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 1:35 PM
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
Thought you might enjoy some of the uhhh...'grumblings' from the left today. I don't think my comment is needed.
"In fronta the tv screens Lester Holt tells me about Defining Marriage. “Eleven States voted to Define Marriage tonight,” says Lester Holt, “and they have Defined it as a slow-moving, thick-skulled poison-spitting reptile that hates queers. America has spoken.” There's a five-hundred-foot tall inflatable rubber president balloon filled with hydrogen an mustard gas floatin overhead. “Leadership! Marriage! Moral values!” says the Inflatable President. “Gonna smoke those gays outta their holes! America’s safer when lesbians can run but they can’t hide!” It must be true. Look at all those electronic ballots!"
"F*ck the world." (edited by host)
And this from his commenters on the 'at least' thread: (which were too good to ignore)
"At least they run the trains on time."
"at least we know the apocalypse is now closer than ever"
"at least when we're still in Iraq in four years, and it's even more of a clusterf*ck, w will still be around to take "credit." Of course, that would require merkins reading newspapers."
"At least 49% of America is not clueless.
At least I have a reason to buy a hand gun to go with the rest of my arsenal."
"At least kitchen-based, clothes-hanger abortion clinics will flourish throughout the land. Run by self-employed entrepreneurs, just like the good old days."
"I was mad, but now a new day is upon us and we will prevail.For all you phoney bible humping,queer haters,the real cossacks are comming ,and it won't be pretty."
"TalkLeft will not support George Bush. We recognize that he is our President, but as our mission statement states, we will continue to expose the injustices in his Administration."
"I Don't Hate PollsI just hate people."
"we're going to see Bush Unleashed -- something that will probably be much crazier than what we've seen over the past four years."
And finally the King of Leftie bloggers--Daily Kos:
"People really are confused and manipulated (we have a mainstream media that continues to focus on irrelevant stories--Swift Boat, Rathergate and all the rest--abrogating its responsibility to focus on what's important and significant; and too much of it keeps giving head instead of keeping its head."
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 6:02 PM
First the good, then the bad.
Giving credit where credit is due. Kerry didn't have to concede so quickly. With the news outlets refusing to give Bush Ohio even with Bush some 130,000 votes ahead, Kerry could hardly be expected to concede at that moment. But when it became clear that Kerry could not overcome the numbers he conceded.
His was a gracious and sweet concession speech. Kerry, the person was never what I had a problem with. Although claiming to be a Catholic but going directly against the Church's teachings is wrong and that did bother me alot. I didn't even care about the Vietnam thing, although I understood why others did.
There are dozens of issues from abortion to the role of the UN to stem cell research to social security that I care deeply about and I disagreed on each and every one with Kerry. But I would take a Kerry over a Clinton (both of them) anytime.
Edwards concession speech was hateful and wrong. Especially the line about how to explain why to a mother who lost a son "over there." The reason is simple pretty boy, freedom. But it is a slap in the face of every parent who has lost someone in this war to imply that there is no reason.
His whole speech ticked me off. Republicans care just as much as democrats about healthcare, social security, the poor, and minorities. We just see a different and better way of solving these problems.
I have to admit that I enjoy knowing that Michael Moore and the entire country of France is having a bad day today. Heh.
We won. Today Rocks. Let us get on to the business of the people.
LET FREEDOM RING.
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 2:41 PM
When I went to sleep at 3am, Bush had 269 with Ohio. It looks like Bush has won, although it's not official yet. I do hope that when it looks obvious enough, Kerry will concede with grace. The country has had enough.
I am VERY VERY happy, but very tired, so I am going back to sleep. It was exhausting just trying to explain to my kids this morning what is going on.
I am pleased and surprised that nothing weird or violent happened last night. Although reading on DU (democratic underground) that they were gonna be wearing black hoodies in protest was kind of hilarious.
Take heart lefties. Bush is a good man and a good leader despite what you have been conditioned to believe. Life will go on the same for you.
I will sleep better knowing a man I trust is the leader of our country.
Speaking of sleep, I have to get some.
God bless America and all of you!!!!!!!!
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 8:46 AM
Tuesday, November 02, 2004
You are known by your friends;
Kerry has been endorsed by the left-leaning Guardian in the United Kingdom and the left-leaning Le Monde is endorsing Kerry in France.
Always nice to be endorsed by a foreign newspaper that just the other day 'jokingly' called for the assassination of our President.
As Joe Scarborough of MSNBC says "When the election is more about who you hate than who you love, you are less likely to get out and vote."
Lets hope that is true.
"Democratic Sen. Tom Daschle sued his opponent, John Thune, and the GOP in federal court in Sioux Falls on Monday, asking Piersol to stop what Democrats say was intimidation of voters." via Argus Leader.com
Part of the evil Republican strategy was as follows:
" Daschle charges that GOP poll observers have been crowding voters, making notes as they voted and writing down license plate numbers of cars bringing them to vote. "
Crowding voters? Hmmm....Isn't is crowded at the polls? And oh boy, when I vote and someone starts taking notes....I JUST GET THE WILLIES!!!!!!!!!!
Lets get real. All these ridiculous lawsuits will be thrown out immediately, I hope. When I think back on REAL voter intimidation that I saw in the 60's with black people trying to vote, it makes me sick what this does to the memory of those brave people.
Speaking of REAL voter intimidation:
"VOTING is off to a bad start in Wisconsin. Thirty vans rented by the Republican National Committee to use in Milwaukee get-out-the-vote efforts were rendered inoperable by vandals overnight. The vehicles were parked near a Republican headquarters on Capitol Drive, where their tires had been slashed. The GOP is scrambling to find replacement vehicles." via Weekly Standard.
Also in Wisconsin:
"One young woman who lives in a heavily Democrat neighborhood in Milwaukee, showed up to vote this morning to find that seven people are registered to vote under her address. She lives with one other person."
Just a tad bit different from "taking notes," don't you think?
Washington, DC , RNC Communications Director Jim Dyke made the following statement today:
After filing more than 40 lawsuits in 18 battleground states in recent weeks, and in keeping with their Election Day playbook, Democrats are prepared to execute an Election Day litigation strategy. As soon as the polls open in the morning, their touted 10,000-plus lawyers will systematically file litigation to change the rules in battleground states across the nation and create a sense of chaos.
Before the day is out, Democrats will begin to argue that every provisional ballot should be counted, regardless of the circumstances or legality in which it was cast, thus allowing them to convert third party registration fraud into voter fraud on behalf of John Kerry.
The Democrats, Election Day litigation strategy has three primary objectives:
Securing special rules and extensions for the benefit of Democrats in predominately Democrat precincts.
Eliminating traditional safeguards against voter fraud, including I.D. requirements and voting in precinct.
Creating a sense of chaos, with the hope of casting a shadow of doubt over Election Day. via GOP.com
Democrats are determined to create a climate of chaos now that they know they can litigate every election.
I hope the people stand up against this and demand decency again before it gets completely out of hand.
"Representatives of MoveOn.org are out in force in Minnesota, setting up tables, holding signs, handing out literature. In some cases, they seem to be violating statutes requiring them to be 100 feet from the polling place. By 10:00 this morning, the Secretary of State's office had received more than 400 complaints. Hard to say, though, whether these people attract more voters than they repel." via Powerline
I have heard that many Republicans who have voted in previous elections, have their voter registration cards and ID, are not showing up on the rolls. But this actually happened to our own Blackfive, Check it out!
I cannot believe that a soldier that fought in this war and says he has voted in the same place since 2000 did NOT have his name on the rolls!!!! He had his voter registration card, and is NOT being allowed to vote!! Asking 10 people around him who were also not on the rolls if they were Republican, ALL said yes.
Well, Sundance Kid, we will miss The Way We Were.....not.
Mark Melman, a democratic pollster is seeming to predict bad news for his side:
"First, we simply do not defeat an incumbent president in wartime. After wars surely, but never in their midst. Republicans have been spinning this fact for months, and they are correct.
Democrats have spoken often and powerfully about the nation’s economic problems. But by historical standards, they are not that bad. The “misery index” is 7.8 today but was 20.5 when Jimmy Carter was defeated. Economic models of elections show Bush winning 52-58 percent of the vote."
Just for the cheating, I hope the democrats lose.
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 10:49 AM
Monday, November 01, 2004
The Middle East Media Research Institute reports the following:
The U.S. media in general mistranslated the words “ay wilaya” (which means “each U.S. state")(2) to mean a “country” or “nation” other than the U.S., while in fact the threat was directed specifically at each individual U.S. state. This suggests some knowledge by bin Laden of the U.S. electoral college system. In a section of his speech in which he harshly criticized George W. Bush, bin Laden stated: “Any U.S. state that does not toy with our security automatically guarantees its own security.” via Protein Wisdom
I did wonder what exactly Bin Laden meant when he said our security was in our own hands. This would explain much. This also should be BIG NEWS. Please let me know if you hear it on any MSM outlet.
I have noticed in my short time blogging that to many this seems like just a game. They make sophmoric references to who wins this election like it's a football game and you are for your team because it is where you went to school and nothing else matters. This isn't a game. This is serious life stuff. When this is over, I will blog about the many many reasons I voted for Bush other than the war. They are reasons that most of my conservative bloggers will disagree with me on. Which goes to show how Bush was able to unite those with different beliefs together for a common cause.
I think about when Clinton won both times. I was 9 months pregnant both times and both times I cried on my bed all day. But this is the thing. Life didn't change for me personally. In all the areas that people argue over , financial, taxes, healthcare, and even social issues, nothing changed much FOR ME. I had little ones and whether Bush Sr was President or Clinton was President, my life went on in a great way because I live my life based on my faith and my values and that has always served me well. I loved my family, I nutured my little ones , and did what I could for others, and life flowed along. So why was I so upset with Clinton, and why will I be upset with Kerry if he wins? Well it doesn't have anything to do with the effect it will have on MY life (unless of course we are attacked again) Although this time around it does seem to have more effect on my children's life now that my oldest are teenagers. My reasons for caring and voting are based on what I feel for others. For what I feel for my country, my culture, and mostly for what I feel for the children of this nation that don't have someone who loves and nurtures them. That is basically what drives me. I have never believed that a government program can give them what they need. I have seen personally that it cannot. But later, when this whole thing (election) is over I will explain why I vote Republican and why it is so important, not for me personally, but for the children who have no voice.
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 1:27 PM
Sunday, October 31, 2004
Ok, while sitting here waiting to dole out the candy to the trick or treaters, I went ahead and blogged. (Trying VERY hard to ignore the chocolate screaming at me from the bowl of candy for the lil spooks)
"The New York Post reports that there's another 12 minutes of tape from Osama bin Laden, in which he bemoans that lack of violence accompanying the elections in Afghanistan and notes the toll of war on terror has had on Al Qaeda.
Officials said that in the 18-minute long tape - of which only six minutes were aired on the al-Jazeera Arab television network in the Middle East on Friday - bin Laden bemoans the recent democratic elections in Afghanistan and the lack of violence involved with it.
On the tape, bin Laden also says his terror organization has been hurt by the U.S. military's unrelenting manhunt for him and his cohorts on the Afghan-Pakistani border.
A portion of the left-out footage includes a tirade aimed at President Bush and his father, former President George H.W. Bush, claiming the war in Iraq is purely over oil." via Wizbang
I have seen a lot of dirty politics in this election, but this about takes the cake. The media CENSORS part of a tape by the man who masterminded the horror that descended on us on 9-11 because:
1) Bin Laden admitting that the war on terror has hurt Al Qaeda would help President Bush, proving he did the right thing.
2) The fact that the "war for oil" democratic talking point is being spouted by the personification of evil might make people think twice about BELIEVING those talking points.
I feel sick, I really do.
Jessica's Well does a most superb job of contrasting hollywood's "I care so much because you all love me so much" million dollar women and the women we freed. Rock on Jessica!
AP reports: A shortage of at least 500,000 poll workers nationwide means many voters could face long lines, cranky volunteers and polling places that don't open or close on schedule.
I'm thinking this could have a negative effect on the Mary Poppins and Elvis vote.
Perhaps the shortage is due to this:
"Michael Moore says a total of 1,200 professional and nonprofessional cameramen, filmmakers and videographers will bring their cameras to polling places in Ohio and Florida to prevent "intimidation."
Moorewatch notes that "Moore himself is BLATANTLY trying to intimidate people with this ploy," and has issued this call: "For every camera crew you see, get two people to film *them*. Watch the watchers."
That's on top of the 100 or so U.N. monitors who will be elbowing their way into polling places across 20 states, including Florida; 10,000 Democrat lawyers; 3,600 GOP observers in Ohio; and 1,090 Justice Department enforcement monitors." via Michelle Malkin
I mean would you want to be a poll worker? Part of your job is to ensure that no voter fraud occurs, yet every time you question someone who doesn't have the proper credentials a Michael Moore film crew will be sure and "edit" the film to make you look like you were "intimidating" some poor soul who only wanted to have his/her vote count.
This whole thing has become the theatre of the absurd. We will soon watch this circus begin. Michael Moore, bring in the clowns.
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 7:02 PM
Posted by RightwingSparkle at 9:33 AM